still reading Mrs. Yohannan's book "Broken for a Purpose"
in only a few short chapters i learn there are women...or at least A woman who has been through the struggles hard things that i am going threw and have faced...
one of the biggest IS who am i? she, too, has been through this...and to me she is like some real important woman and she gets to serve Jesus and she goes to other countries as a missionary..and etc..
and she asks herself this one night on a train...and then in the morning someone gives her a book entitled
WHO ARE YOU? she felt so loved by Jesus that He would do that for her...
and she tells about the book and some of the scriptures in it... i will list some... to me though and i will finish the chapter to see what she has said).. they have become christian cliches that do not answer my question but cover up my question and pain in asking it... it is like they are told to me...and then shhh hurry on now.. you bother me.
here are a few... of the scriptures.. and i am in no way putting down either of the books OR the Scriptures!! no no! i am just telling my thoughts and trying to sort things out...
• I am a son of God (1 John 3:2).
• I am born of God (John 1:13).
• I am an heir of God (Galatians 4:7).
• I am a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17).
• I am accepted in the Beloved (Ephesians 1:6).
• I am blessed with all spiritual blessings (Ephesians 1:3).
These are all good and perfect and God's Word...
but sometimes to me it seems like some self-help ritual i must say.. look in the mirror and tell yourself these things. while im at it i might put on a light blue sweater and say im smart and doggon-it people like me!
i know all these scriptures are true... but i only FEEL? them sometimes...and it seems i only stand strong in them a day or two... what value am i? who am i? why am i here? i understand the Word to us..
and i believe it...with all my heart. i know what i WAS and i know what JESUS has done in me alone...only HE could have done it. not me.
i still ask these questions though..especially who am i? what is my exact purpose and what "Body" part am i IN the Beloved.... what is my purpose what good works was i created to do for Him to His glory?
wow!!! i scrolled down after the list of scriptures and this is what she had written... (im thankful to Jesus for this book)
ReplyDelete"All these declarations sound wonderful, but one look at our Christian lives will tell us that we fall way short in our attempts to live up to them." ~pg. 32, Broken for a Reason.
still breaking...
ReplyDeletestill dying..
still waiting for the Lord.